Wishing I could beat some sense into her damn head

Alicia, my little sis.. what a trainwreck. Not only is she dating/in love with te creepiest guy this side of the planet, but she is having his child. Ok, fine.. it happens, let's deal with it... First off they spent all last summer/year in jail for heroin possession. After she got out she came to live with me for a few months and I thought she was going to fly straight.. well he was released and she ran straight to him. I was here by then and pregnant.. I think this got her biological clock ticking and I feel like she got pregnant on purpose.. Bad, but still not the worst of it. Next she comes to us a few months later to tell us she was using again, she has been going to the methadone clinic but can't detox or it very well may kill her baby. She has to have the baby in Charelston where it will have to stay for 3 weeks to detox as it will be addicted when born. So with all this, one would imagine, he, the baby's father would try to get off drugs.. .wrong. That maybe they would plan a future... wrong. The house they used to live in (which was his families and they lived there for free) is condemned basically.. it was torn up during the drug bust. They currently reside at his grandmothers, who passed away about 2 months ago. The house is going to be sold and they can move into the other one if they get it in livable condition... they have done NOTHING. She hasn't even tried to get ready for this baby. I'm sick over it. SICK. I am not letting this child be kept in a filfthy, drug rampant househols. Either I, or the state will have that baby. I am sur I will lose my sister over it. Who cares anymore.. I already have. What's going to happen when the little baby girl breaks his crack pipe... duct tape her up like he has my sister?? The baby she plans to name... get ready for this... Nova Leigh Euphroia Owsley. Ouch. Uhhhh. I am at a loss.. there is nothing I can make her do from here... she doesn't listen... every single thing she has for that baby had been given to her by myself, my mother or others. She literally plans to try to get on welfare and never work. THAT is her fucking goal in life. Not that she ever has worked...

I have no idea where she came from. honestly. It's not the same blood that courses through my veins.

Sisters, mom and me

I think it's safe to say for the first time ever I have the most stable life of the three of us. (Not that this is any grand accomplishment... but if you have known me for any length of time you will see the irony in this...)
It feels weird to be talking to my mom about coupons, diapers, husbands, buying houses and actually care about the stuff she is saying. I generally smile and nod since mom's life has been so different from mine... I never really felt like we had much in common. She married my dad when she was 17, never worked, has only seen his penis...never even been drunk. ( I know, the last one is sad... we are working on this) I'm starting to see the truth in the old adage about mom's and daughters being really close once the girls start reproducing. I know... the creepiness/ corniness is taking over me.
My little sister... where do I start? I love her SO much. She is my babans. Now, my family is unusually close. We moved ten times before I was 20 years old. We needed each other. She has taken a path I just can't understand. Abusive boyfriends, drugs, jail, not really working etc... Now she is pregnant, and for that I am so happy... but.... she STILL isn't doing anything to make her life better. I hesitate to say anything to her because she is this fragile, sensitive thing who gets her feelings hurt so easily. It's amazing she has survived this long being related to me. I'm scared for her and how her life is going to turn out because she has NO idea how tough it is going to be taking care of that baby essentially alone. I'm waiting on pins and needles for the other foot to fall.... and fall it will.
And sissie, my Stefanie.... Found a gray hair today... and this my friends indicates to her she is past her prime. Isn't that ridiculous? If 17 years old and completely retarded about life is your prime then we are all flat ass screwed. Honestly.... If being gorgeous, brilliant, educated, driven, funny and knowing how to properly contract words is a bad thing my whole world just turned upside down. On the flip side I do not understand why all these perfectly amazing women... and it's not just her (cough, bobbi) waste their time STILL with useless men who don't deserve them. But that's a whole other blog.

Sooner rather than later---- KB