whowwhowwhow

that's the charlie brown teacher sound for the record.

Been getting ready to head to the beach for 10 days.. It's gonna be eventful to say the least. David's mom and sis will be there for a couple days, some of my good friends from gso are driving down for a few, my two sisters, my mom, me and nuffy. Plus the friends I have left there that are sure to pop in. Hello, estrogen.
I hate going there though, I wish my sis's would get out of there. That was a bad time in my life and a horrible place for me to live. It's so small too that you always get seen or see someone you'd rather not. I rarely go. Can't exactly skip my own sister's shower.
I'm gonna fly to TPA and help mom drive up... now THAT is going to be a true test of my patience and willpower. Setting aside the fact a 10 hour drive will take 14 hours at the rate she drives, and I am going to hear the same 10 stories over and over, I'm going to have Nuffy with me. Yikes. I swear it crossed my mind to get a 5 month olf a dvd player so he could watch baby einstein on the road. Take that good mommies of the world, my kind is taking over!
Needless to say, I doubt there will be a whole lot of blogging till I get back. (not that there is alot going on anyways)
Mandy... enjoy the wedding. tell me all about it.
Sarah... need the litterbox report on the breeze when I get home.
Lauren... enjoy pet sitting my animals, they are disasters. BUhahhaha.

So I hope everyone has a grand week, I will see some of you soon. And for the others smell ya later!

KB

Full circle.

So I caught some flack for being a loser and not even being able to keep up with a measly blog. How do I even have friends left? I certainly can't seem to ever answer my phone. Point is, here I am, forgiven?

We've all seen in the news recently the polygamy colony freakshow. I can't seem to get over the twistedness of it all. Mostly because of the children. Which brings me to another topic.. one which I truly had planned on blogging over. I watched this movie, Gone, baby gone. It's a well made movie, excellent, in fact...but if you do see it be prepared to be disturbed as I was. (And maybe read this after seeing it, the following will ruin it) The basic premis is that a child is missing and the family hires private investigators to assist the police and them in locating her. The mother turns out to be a drug runner and you are led to believe through the exchange with her kidnapper that she dies. As it turns out the police chief lost his child to murder and he has set up a ruse to steal the child. He asks the question "Isn't she better off here?" Well.... yes.... the mother was a piece 'o' shit. But, who is he, I or anyone else to decide what is, in fact best for a child? When does nature, where a child naturally wants it's mother, get trumped by what society deems is best for the child? Those who know me can probably guess why this is hitting close to home. Secondly, as a subplot, one of the kidnapping suspects is a pedophile. When another child goes missing and the PI fings him dead and raped in the house of the pedophile, he loses it and shoots the creep. (After vomiting.. it truly was an awful scene) Later at the hospital, where he is racked with guilt, one cop asks him would he do it again? He says no. As a catholic, he states it's a sin. True, murder is evil. But honestly, had I been in that situation, I feel like I would have done the same thing. And done it again. So when is wrong, truly WRONG? Maybe it was having a child that makes me insane over the now, but I get livid thinking about people who can hurt children. And it happens daily. I think I am starting to believe in capital punishment.

Especially for people like this:

http://abcnews.go.com/US/Story?id=3912395

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/front/5541849.html


Anyone ever heard of "safehouses"? I know so many people who want, and deserve children. Yet here they are childless while useless human beings are giving birth all over the place. I have been having some nightmares to rival all nighmares. Let it be said, if anyone ever hurts my boy... you will all be welcome at my murder trial.


Ps. I'd like to throw in a shoutout here to my brilliant friend Emily, who is an esteemed employee of this fine laboratory. Who just so happen to be doing some important work right now:

http://www.thetimesnews.com/news/texas_12804___article.html/samples_children.html

Mandy... how do I put in the cute little hidden links that you always do?

I've been thinkin about my doorbell

When you gonna ring it, when you gonna ring it.

Gahhh, get that song out of my head. Just in case you needed something in your headto get stuck ... http://www.zshare.net/audio/8393066e955df5/ hehehe, sorry kids.

I know, two posts in one day

I have to start this... photographic documetation of Kenickie's ceasless search for the least comfortable sleeping locations.

THE desk

Saw this in pottery barn.... showed David the picture and voila:

Make it LAST, thanks dad

I was thinking last night about one of my dad's claim to fame. (He is a hero in his own mind by the way) History; My parents have been married since their teens, what is now going on 35 years. They meant their vows.

Regardless... Ages ago.. On a drive home from work one day, Dad was listening to the radio and the dj asked listeners to call in and tell what makes their marriage last... Dad is really into clever anologies, anagrams etc... So, he came up with this.. it's my parents relationship gospel.

To make it last, you've got to make it L-A-S-T

L- listen to eachother

A- apologize

S- share eachother's interests

T- touch


Clever, huh?

Quite possibly the cutest thing I have seen to date

Kenneth has one of those illegal rolling exersuacer things... I know, I know, wheels are bad. It was given to me and it's cute... so hush. Plus, I don't have stairs. So far Kenneth has been fearless and I have yet to see him scared.. today I put him in the thing for the first time since his feet could touch the ground. He immediately launched himself backwards.. the kids legs are seriously strong. Anyways, his little baby eyes got SO wide, he skipped a beat and started crying the most pitiful cry you have eveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer heard. How can a mother thing think that's cute? Becasue the second I scooped him I literally felt the relief wash over him, mommy saved him. I had a moment, I don't have many of those feel good, mushy moments.. or if I do, I seldom notice them. And for the record, I put him back in it after a minute, can't have my boy being a pansy. kidding, kidding... but really... wasn't that right? So he wasn't fearful of it in the future? He was totally fine, I think it was the initial shock of moving when he was not expecting it..

ehhh. anyways, Happy Monday.

Wishing I could beat some sense into her damn head

Alicia, my little sis.. what a trainwreck. Not only is she dating/in love with te creepiest guy this side of the planet, but she is having his child. Ok, fine.. it happens, let's deal with it... First off they spent all last summer/year in jail for heroin possession. After she got out she came to live with me for a few months and I thought she was going to fly straight.. well he was released and she ran straight to him. I was here by then and pregnant.. I think this got her biological clock ticking and I feel like she got pregnant on purpose.. Bad, but still not the worst of it. Next she comes to us a few months later to tell us she was using again, she has been going to the methadone clinic but can't detox or it very well may kill her baby. She has to have the baby in Charelston where it will have to stay for 3 weeks to detox as it will be addicted when born. So with all this, one would imagine, he, the baby's father would try to get off drugs.. .wrong. That maybe they would plan a future... wrong. The house they used to live in (which was his families and they lived there for free) is condemned basically.. it was torn up during the drug bust. They currently reside at his grandmothers, who passed away about 2 months ago. The house is going to be sold and they can move into the other one if they get it in livable condition... they have done NOTHING. She hasn't even tried to get ready for this baby. I'm sick over it. SICK. I am not letting this child be kept in a filfthy, drug rampant househols. Either I, or the state will have that baby. I am sur I will lose my sister over it. Who cares anymore.. I already have. What's going to happen when the little baby girl breaks his crack pipe... duct tape her up like he has my sister?? The baby she plans to name... get ready for this... Nova Leigh Euphroia Owsley. Ouch. Uhhhh. I am at a loss.. there is nothing I can make her do from here... she doesn't listen... every single thing she has for that baby had been given to her by myself, my mother or others. She literally plans to try to get on welfare and never work. THAT is her fucking goal in life. Not that she ever has worked...

I have no idea where she came from. honestly. It's not the same blood that courses through my veins.

Finally.. a breakdown

I knew eventually the exhaustion, the lonliness, missing people, having an unpleasant/unhappy baby, a wild dog, a new marriage etc would prove too much and I would crack. Today I hada breakdowm and cried so hard I couldn't breath. I'll start from the beginning...

I love David. Alot. But we were only together a few months before I got pregnant, granted I knew him longer and that helped.. .but still. He loves me intensely. Sometimes he smothers me... grabs me every time I walk past, wants me to sit on the couch that he is on, don't leave the room he is in, can't we go to bed at the same time?... on and on. It wears on me.. I have NEVER been overly affectionate. I feel like maybe he thought I was putting on a hard front but this REALLY is how I am.. not a hugger, snuggler, cuddler, hand holder. I'm just not. I think it hurts his feelings... and he takes it so personal. I feel like I am walking on eggshells all the time now. My smart ass comments too. He takes it all so personal. Sometimes I tell him something he DID and it's like I don't love him anymore in his mind. I love him... just not what he did... does that make sense? So I am on edge alot.. it's gotten better the longer we have been together.. but I fear I can't give him what he needs. Guess it's a little late... either way, it's a stress.

Finn is out of control.. I have met so many dogs working at vets thru the years. But never one that didn't want to please his owners at all..... Finn.... just does what he wants, knowing there will be punishment, but apparently the crime is worth it. Example.. he eats everyone elses food, and poop. (i know, its gross) SO... he knows he shouldnt do it... sees you coming, and eats as much as fast as he can until you get there to drag him away. He KNOWS, but does what he wants anyways. He charges thru the door, hits everything in his path (including the baby if he is in the way) refuses to stop trying to get Kenneth's shes to eat, or his diapers for that matter. i really have tried everything. I trained Luna, she hates other dogs but she is a well behaved pet.
So, we do a favor for our friends and babysit their 2 boxers for 4 days. Tex and Ginger. They fight with our dogs (figures) So first off I told them LAST weekend was ok... David was here. Well, they rescheduled their trip and show up unannounced Friday.. and David was on a trip.. it's me, Kenneth and 4 big, fighting dogs. Well, I end up having to keep two in a bedroom and let two out to roam alternately. They tore up the door frame in the spare bedroom, chewed up a couple of Kenneths toys, vomited on the floor, and chewed a few other random things.
Fucking Finn, gets into their food and eats as much as he can get before I catch him.... it gives him diarrhea... all over my bedroom. It looks like someone put diarrhea in a blender and turned it on.... POOP EVERYWHERE

Then the toilet overflows.. I still don't know why... I've plugged up a toilet before but not with pee.

Kenneth starts to cry

it starts to rain on us while we are out buying a plunger

kenneth cried harded

I spend ALOT of time listening to my friends and families problems.... yet whe I hysterically call 4 people in a row.. not 1 answers or has time to listen to me for 5 seconds. I NEVER need to talk about my problems.. I can handle alot... but this morning was too much. And noone was there.


And David's solution was to put Finn out in the yard from now on... right... a golden retriever outside on Houston in the summer? sure. It's his dog, he needs to do something with him... train him, or take him to the golden rescue.

uhhh.